I have learned the tell tale signs of a grombie. A grombie is a groom zombie – he is the one walking around listlessly not quite knowing what to do the day of the wedding. He has a slight dazed looked and slackened face, surprised at what is happening during the wedding.
It is very important for me to identify a grombie. When confronted with a grombie, there is a very high probability that I will be faced with a spawned bridezilla. She will be in full force leading up to the wedding ceremony. It is out of self-preservation that I’ve developed these tell tale signs of a grombie:
“Whatever you want, honey” is the answer to any question I ask them at the prep-meeting. It is an abdication of teamwork. It also puts all the decision-making on the bride. This burden will turn into overwhelming stress on the wedding day- and spawn the bridezilla. He is clearly a grombie.
“You’ll need to ask her” is the answer I get to any question I ask when I am on-site for the ceremony. He really has no clue as to what is going on because he has not been part of the decision-making process. In the one hour just before the ceremony, the bride is putting final touches to her outfit. She is not on-site and cannot rationally make decisions on issues that come up when she is not present. The grombie adds to her stress by being unable to make timely decisions the day of the wedding.
“Do you know who the groom is? I’ve never met him” is a clear sign of a grombie. This is what I get from vendors when I am on-site. The venue, cake supplier and others admit to never seeing the groom during the vendor discussions. No wonder he has no clue who the cake supplier is, when the cake is supposed to be delivered and if it is even the right cake. When the bride arrives and sees the wrong cake you get an instant spawned bridezilla!
Grooms if you want a wonderful wedding day full of great memories, don’t be a grombie. Your sweet bride will not resemble herself as a bridezilla. The best thing is for you to work with her from the beginning and create a great team in realizing your dream day. If you don’t feel comfortable in sitting through bridal shows, food tastings and invitation selections, hire a professional planner to help her through these. In doing either of these, you will be marrying the girl of your dreams – not the spawned bridezilla.