Grooms: Caution Grombies Spawn Bridezillas

I am walking up to the wedding venue to perform a ceremony. I think back at our meeting recalling that they are a nice couple. When I find the bride, I discover she has turned into a bridezilla – shouting orders to people and generally freaking out. Why did this happen, I ask myself?

The answer is very simple – stress. The bride is at a point where she is feeling the weight of responsibility for the whole event. The accumulated stress has sent her into overdrive and she is now in commander mode.

When I meet bridezilla, I know there is one reason why she has gotten to this point. Her betrothed is a grombie – a groom zombie. He has no clue as to what is going on while wandering aimlessly with a slack and slightly bewildered expression on his face. The bride took on all the responsibilities for the wedding. Her stressed out condition spawned the bridezilla before us.

Unfortunately for all of us, it makes for an awkward and unpleasant experience. I wonder sometimes if the grombie is wondering what happened to his sweet bride? ”Is this who I am marrying?” he might ask himself.

In my experience there are two ways to prevent the spawning of bridezilla.

1-   Get involved. The absent groom who abdicates any ownership in the wedding is setting himself up. Successful weddings are because both the bride and groom have been intimately working together in all aspects of the planning. Decisions are made together and therefore the bride will feel supported. Stress is shared and you can spell off each other.

2-   Hire a professional planner. If you don’t feel you can sit through bridal shows, food tastings and invitation selections, then hire a planner to assist your bride. You can choose from full service planners to day-of planners according to your budget. The minimum is the day-of planner because she handles all the crucial details to make your day happen. This is a huge stress reliever.

Grooms, by making an early selection into either of this two strategies, you will not be a grombie that spawned the bridezilla. You will have a wedding full of pleasant memories.