What’s Love got to do with it?

What’s Love got to do with it? Well everything, really. The lyrics from the Tina Turner song take a cynical view that one shouldn’t love because your heart can be broken. It is a sad statement to say that one should live a life without love because of fear. Gosh there is enough to fear about in life; terrorism, financial collapse, earthquakes… that finding love and happiness even for brief periods should be  welcomed.

I had the good fortune to listen to His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama in Ottawa in 2004. I brought with me my sweetheart (my wife of 30 years) and three children. We were absolutely enthralled by his 2hr talk. He did what any good presenter knows; you tell em what your going to say, you say it, then you tell em what you said.  His message can be distilled to this. The pursuit of human happiness can be attained through Love and your purpose. Purpose here is being used as what you do.

Similarly, Victor Frankl, Auschwitz-survivor, psychiatrist and author of the book “Man’s Search for Meaning”, said “We can discover this meaning in life in three different ways: (1) by creating a work or doing a deed; (2) by experiencing a something or encountering someone; and (3) by the attitude we take toward unavoidable suffering.” In otherwords, you can find meaning and happiness through 1) what you do 2) whom you love and 3) a positive attitude.

Isn’t it interesting that the eastern and western philosophies have come to the same conclusion. Therefore, it must be a truth that Love has everything to do with it.

Ah – I hear the cynics out there saying, “What about the divorce rate of 45% !” Yes the divorce rate in Canada is 45%. Statistics Canada also indicates that the most divorces occur at five years of marriage. Then the incidence decreases with time. So I guess there is some truth to the 7 year itch. But there is also a re-marriage rate as people find new Love. The net non-married from divorce rate is really 30%. Another interesting fact is that co-habitation (living together) before getting married does not guarantee a better marriage. In fact, the divorce rate for couples who previous co-habitated before getting married is worse than those who get engaged and married immediately.

These facts are very interesting. My opinion is that happiness is found in Love – absolutely – however one must work and be dedicated to that Love to sustain it. I say in every ceremony, “Marriage is a promise, a potential, made in the hearts of two people who love, which takes a lifetime to fulfill.” In today’s quick paced society, that lifetime can be short or long, depending on many circumstances which the couple sometimes can control and others that just happens. If the lifetime of that Love has run its course, then it is better to move on and continue your pursuit of happiness in other Love.

Do not fear to Love. Love a person, your works and celebrate life today!